Today Jonathan was having quite a hard time obeying. I knew it was going to be a bit hard for him to obey because he didn't get the full nights sleep he needed two nights in a row. His behavior was such that he needed consequences for his actions.
He looked at me and just started bawling. Not I got in trouble tears, or angry tears, genuine sad tears. He looked at me and said "It's so Hard!" I asked him what was so hard and he said, "It's so hard to obey. Can you help me?"
He has asked me for help before and we have talked about how God is our helper and we can always ask Him to help us obey and do what is right. Jonathan looked at me again and said "Can you help me pray?"
We prayed, and he calmed down and almost fell imediately asleep in my arms. Then I began to pray. "Lord thank you! In the middle of a hard parenting day you gave me the help I needed to parent well, You gave me the words to say, You gave my little boy a soft heart to ask for help. You are our helper!"
Just when I thought Jonathan was asleep he looked up at me and said. "It's so hard to obey, can you make it easy?" We talked about how some things in life are just hard. Sometimes we have to learn to obey no matter what. BUT, if I could help him, and make it easier for him I would. I told him the easiest way to fall asleep would be to close his eyes. He did, and fell into a deep sleeps.
As he slept I rocked him and continued to pray. "Isn't that what I want Lord? I want you to make it easy for me. I want my trials to be simple, painless, and to learn without going through much. I know life is hard but I want it to be easy to obey. You have made it possible though, Lord, You have given us your Son and Your Holy Spirit. It's Hard Lord. Help me obey."
I hope that Jonathan learned something tangible about God today. I hope he remembers that when he asked for help he received it. I hope he knows that the first person to turn to is always the Lord. I know it's my job to remind him and teach him. I just pray pray pray the lessons stick.
What a weighty and beautiful thing it is to be a mom.