Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Yosemite

We went to Yosemite for the first time! WOW! It was amazing. I'm going to come back and post pictures and write stories, but mostly I just wanted to get a post out there that said I went. I don't want to foget to come back and write about it.

If you haven't gone, then go! Go now.

Self Denial

I've been reading a book on prayer and it has shown me that I have not really denied myself much of anything at all.

Realy, to type it out is a bit embarrassing. I can't think of anything I've really denied myself for a long period of time.

The Lord has shown me this. What have I denied so that I could spend more time with HIM? What have I denied myself so that I could be healthier, and thus more able to serve my family? What have I denied myself so I could be available to serve the church? What have I denied myself to help Kyle and I reach goals in our life?

I have denied myself very little.

I have had to really confess this to the Lord and beg Him for the strength to live in the Spirit and not the Flesh and to run hard after Him and deny myself anything that would hinder my walk, or not be the "best" decision.

I think I originally viewed self-denial as a "trapped" feeling. I thought of all that I wouldn't have or shouldn't have... I have learned it is the exact opposite.

It's freeing.

I have more time in prayer, which draws me closer to the Lord and helps me live in the Spirit and deny sin. I have more energy for my family, and to keep up with my toddler. I feel that I can say "yes" more because I am more organized with my time and priorities.

The wisdom of man is not the wisdom from above. How often do I think, even subconsciously, that God's ways don't make sense? Too often!

Here is to self-denial and running hard in the way He has called.

looking back

Sometimes I don't realize just how much Jonathan has grown until I look at a video or picture of him from a year ago.

His imagination is amazing!  He is almost always pretending to be an animal. He has stories about who he is and where he came from and the zoo is one of his favorite places.

He still loves to snuggle. Yay! I truly Praise the Lord for that. I love his hugs and every once in awhile he will come up to me and say "Mom, I have a secret... I love you." Melt. My. Heart.

He's a bit fiestier than he used to be, and tests the boundaries, I love to see him push himself, just so long as he doesn't push me.

I have to be so consistent with him. I have learned that the hard way.

He loves to laugh and he wants everyone to be happy.

Recently I said I was disappointed in a choice he made. He cried in my lap for 20 minutes because he was "SO SAD" that he made me disappointed. I love that tenderness. I also have to be careful of my words, they deeply affect him.

I love him. I love being his mom. I love watching him grow.

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Watching him grow

I was just watching a video of Jonathan from a year ago (when he was a new 2 year old) Melt my heart he was the cutest thing in the world. And somehow he's still the cutest thing in the world. It's crazy how when you are in the day to day you stop seeing them grow, but when you look back you see huge changes.

I wish there was a way to see the growth in the day to day, every stage is so much fun and being Jonathan's mom is one of my greatest joys.

I have also realized things I was diligent to focus on with him a year ago I haven't been quite so diligent in these past months since we've moved. Lame. So I am redoubling my efforts and going to get back on track. He loves to draw and read and learn. It's hard to keep up with him sometimes, and to always keep his little mind stimulated, but I LOVE to watch him learn. He is so imaginative.

I wonder How God thinks about watching us grow. I have thought a lot about him being our Heavenly Father lately and His great tender loving care for us. I find myself going to Him, casting my cares on Him and knowing He is tenderly caring for me, as a Father. I'm in awe that He wants to give me good gifts. The God of the Universe wants to give me good gifts. Wow.


Tuesday, April 11, 2017

7 months

This past Monday marked 7 months since we moved to Kingsburg. I was reflecting a bit (maybe something you would normally do at 6 months or a year, but for me it was 7 months) and there are some things I never want to forget.

Cooking with Gail on Tuesday and Thursday mornings got me through those first couple of months. Gail has the Lord on her lips. She was constantly encouraging me with what He was teaching her and she is an incredibly THANKFUL person. You couldn't help but be with her and walk away thankful. She also loved on Jonathan and encouraging me in parenting. She was my first friend in Kingsburg. I love her.

The house we are renting was a complete answer to prayer, and a very stark reminder to cast your cares on the Lord and not be anxious. We had been looking for a place for what seemed like forever. We had been in transition for a month, Kyle working up in the central valley and us still back in Santa Clarita. We missed being together as a family, and we just didn't seem to be able to find a good place. Kyle looked at me as we drove back from Kingsburg to Santa Clarita and said "Babe, you really need to give this over to the Lord. Confess it to Him. He is faithful, He has always been faithful. We are going to find a place to live. Be patient". I did give it over to the Lord, and exactly 5 minutes later we got a call that there was a house available to rent from a family in our church. Wow.

The Jacksons let us stay in their guest house for a month... yes, a month. That'a long time to let people be in your way! What generosity and hospitality.

The people who did know about our miscarriage loved us so well, and still pray for us. We were strangers, but they still served and cared.

And just this past week we were invited to spend Easter with a family from church that we are getting to know and really like. That might sound kinda small. It's not! When you are the new family and don't know anyone and someone opens their doors for a holiday. You just feel so very loved.

The fog was hard, but the spring is worth it.

I enjoy having some change in the seasons again.

Gail shared with me something the Lord is teaching her anew. "Rejoice Always". I want to remember that.

The Fernandez's. Friendship is just one of the sweetest dearest blessings the Lord can give. And he gave us that in them.

Friday, April 7, 2017

Drizzly Friday

Another Friday, another dump post.

It's a rainy day. It's been on and off all day, right now it's just barely drizzling and so Kyle is doing a little bit of yard prep work. (we are planning grass seed tomorrow) Jonathan is playing with Ginny and having a mostly good time.

My thoughts on having a puppy so far: I am glad we decided to get one. It isn't as hard as I told myself it would be, at least in terms of taking care of her. The puppy teething stage is no fun. Her favorite toy to nibble on is Jonathan. I go from hearing the sweetest giggles to "MAMA! HELP!" and Ginny has started biting his pant legs. I am praying that the teething passes quickly, very quickly, because I do think having a little playmate is wonderful for Jonathan!

We have a couple fun trips coming up. 2 short weekend ones and one longer one visiting family. I'm getting excited as they get a bit closer.

I've been reading so much more lately than I have in the past 6 months to a year and it's been simply wonderful.

I found out that the elder's were praying for us this past week. That we would be able to have another baby and that we'd continue to heal from the miscarriage. It meant so much to me.


Wednesday, April 5, 2017

and the ugly

I said I wanted to do this blog to remember it all, the good the bad and the ugly. Monday we had some real ugly. 

Only one of our cars is really road worthy at the moment and so Jonathan and I have been mostly homebound. (Which isn't really a problem.. see previous post) But I thought it would be fun to take him to the zoo for the afternoon since Fresno has a great zoo (more about that in another post, it really is a great zoo. Anyway...) 

I planned out this trip very poorly from the get go. ( Elizabeth Bennet would say "very ill indeed". Sorry for all the parentheses and side comments, but it's where my head is at today) I decided that since J is now 3 he probably wouldn't need the stroller and could just walk all day. Feel free to laugh at me at this point. I also forgot his comfort items tiger and blankie. I also thought he'd be fine to skip a nap, since all children are fresh and don't need naps after the ever so difficult church days (read with extreme sarcasm) 

Well we were dropped off at the zoo and it began beautifully. the first hour and a half were perfection. People were telling me I must be an amazing mom because my toddler was So polite and So well behaved. Jonathan was thrilled with everything he saw and was precious to watch. Then one minute past and hour and a half struck. I suddenly had a stomach ache and NEEDED the bathroom stat. I told Jonathan that he needed to come with mommy very very quickly and he looked at me and said "NO!" 

He then proceeded to lay on the ground and scream, "I don't want to leave the fish tank! I don't want to go to the bathroom with you!" My desperation only grew. He was not getting up and my need for the bathroom was getting more dire. 

There was nothing for it, it was either run for the bathroom and leave my 3 year old alone at the zoo, or drag him across the floor all the way into the bathroom stall with me. 

I dragged him. 

I was stared at by children who thought either "That boy is in So much trouble" as was audibly heard by a couple of young children, or they thought "I am never having kids." Which felt like it was audibly heard by some teenagers.

Then there were the mothers. 

The sweet sypathetic mothers.

One looked at me and said "You got this."

One looked at me as we were trying to get through the doorway of the bathroom. "It's ok sweetie, I have boys, I understand. You're not alone." 

Oh sweet motherhood. It makes you the best of friends with complete strangers because we can understand each others pain. 

We then sat in the shade and watched the lions for the rest of the 2 and a half hours waiting to be picked up.

I hope I come back and read this the next time I am either having a bad day, or if heaven forbid I ever find myself judging another mom. 

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

At Home

The Lord has always laid it on my heart to be a worker at home, and yet lately I have felt that conviction even stronger. Not exactly just to be a worker at home, but to do it excellently. I have been home with Jonathan since he was born, and have loved it! I love making a home and cooking meals for my family and raising my son. However, I noticed in myself that I was simply going through the motions too much and not being intentional with my time and my activities throughout the day.

Then, and this may seem un-related but it isn't, we have had about 5 different families tell Kyle and I seemingly out of the blue that they believe one of our spiritual gifts is hospitality. I think I have asked people what they think my spiritual gifts are before, usually after hearing a sermon on them or something of the sort, but I can't remember a time that people have come to Kyle and I as a couple and pointed this out. I have been praying about it and it seems the Lord is again telling me, "be a worker at home"

It really is related, I'm convicted to be a worker at home to serve and love my family, and to serve and love the church.

I also know that this may not be my spiritual gifting but we are all called to be hospitible. It's a command. SO, wether I'm actually gifted in it or not, I must do it. If I must do it, I better do it well.

I have been praying, begging the Lord to give me self-discipline, and the drive to be diligent in my work, but not just for the work's sake, but so that I can bless my family and the church and be a light for Christ. I am praying the Lord blesses my efforts, because right now I mostly just see how much I need to grow in these ways!

Meal Planning

Meal Planning was quite overwhelming to me, and try as I might to follow all of the super "easy" to follow plans, or 'fool proof' plans, it just wasn't working for me. I didn't like eating a casserole for dinner every night. I needed a better way to get well balanced meals into my family, and I just don't have enough freezer space for 30 frozen dinners. So, I came up with my own method. I hope it's helpful, if not, I hope you find a method that works for you.

Before you read this you have to forget all that you know about meal planning and freezing meals. I don't do it the "normal" way. Come to this open minded. This is meal planning and prepping, not everything is frozen, though I do use the freezer.

1. Look at your mothly calendar. I need to know what days I'll be out of town so I don't plan a meal that day, and  what days I'm having people over so I make a little extra. This way I know exactly how many meals to plan and how much.

2. I have a couple days of the week that are themed. This really simplifies things for me, and the boys like the tradition of it. We always do tacos on Monday. Come to our house on a Monday and we will be eating chicken tacos. We will be doing this for the rest of our lives, they are delicious! Come have them any Monday. (except this one monday in april, I switched it and we are having them on Wednesday when we have some friends for dinner.) Every Sunday night we do Breakfast for dinner. Yum! I also schedul one day a week as a "left-overs" day. I hate wasting food and money. So, because 3 days of the week I always know what I'm doing, I only need to come up with 4 new meals. 

3. Fill in 3 of the remaining days with things you know your family likes, and then make that 4th day a "new" meal. Finish out the rest of the month like this.

4. Now look through your pantry, see what you already have that you can use for your meals then make your grocery list.

5. Make note of what things you'll need to get mid-month. Like fresh fruit, bread, milk,eggs... 

Now I will give you my April meal plan so you can see what I mean, and then I'll tell you how I prepped it. (Sorry this is long, but I really hope it's helpful)



Ok, so now that I know WHAT I'm eating every day, I can prep for it. I chop all the veggies that I will have in every meal, Yep. Chop all the veggies. Put them in ziplock freezer bags and stick them in the freezer until you are ready to use them. I leave in my refrigerator all the veggies I will use for this week. They are chopped and ready to cook.

I also cook all of the ground beef that I will use for the month. I do this in a couple of different skillets so I can season them according to the meal. Then I let the cooked meat cool and put them in freezer bags. Again, leaving in the fridge what I will use for this week.

I will make the baked french toast, the chicken pot pie, and the enchiladas and freeze them. These are the only meals that will be fully made and frozen.

I will also make a bunch of frozen breakfast burritos and leave them in the freezer so that Kyle can grab them in the morning and have breakfast on those days he gets up before I do.

So there is still some cooking that happens every day. I find that if you cook and freeze chicken ahead of time it just gets dry in the thawing/ warming up process. You do still need to cook your veggie's, but they are prepped. And that's really the difference to me, being able to just grab what I need and get to cooking. Also, knowing what we are going to eat every day really helps me not throw together something lame last minute, or something super un-healthy.

Happy Meal Planning!

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Marriage

I was asked today how my marriage is.

Without hesitation I said great! And whats better is that I meant it. My friend continued to ask about my husband, what is so great about him? What do I see the Lord doing in his life? How does he lead well? Where have I seen growth in him.

I was able to rattle off answers.

Kyle loves the Lord and is teachable, so the Lord does amazing things in his life and grows him through His word, and from being under good teaching. I'm so glad that Kyle WANTS to be under good teaching. I was able to talk about Kyle pursuing godly friendships that spur him on to Love the Lord more, to lead us well, and how he wants to be humble.

I talked about his growth and how he has grown in discernment and wisdom and leadership.

I don't want to take any of that for granted. I know personally, too many dear friends who are in hard marriages, I have some friends who have gone through divorce. I know that I am deeply blessed with a good marriage to an amazing man of God.

I am especially thankful for the example that Kyle is to Jonathan. I really can't put into words how wonderful it is that Kyle is able to teach Jonathan how to lead a home, how to love a wife, how to pursue God.

I pray daily that it is Kyle who leads Jonathan to Christ. What a blessing that would be.

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Banana Bread

I just got this new bread box from World Market and I love it and so I had to make some bread to put in it right away. I made Banana Bread. It's something my two boys love... and I discovered today, so does the dog.

Anyway, I like the bread box because it looks nice, has the cutting board built right in and because it looks nice I don't mind leaving it on my counter. I really like things that check the form and function box.



Here is my banana bread recipe.

3 ripe bananas
4 TBS buttermilk (you can use regular milk, but I think buttermilk makes for a better bread)
1 tsp. vanilla
2 eggs
1/4 cup butter (softened, not melted)
1/3 cup sugar
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 1/2 cup flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda

(Chopped walnuts optional.... I think they are delicious but my 3 year old doesn't like too many textures in his food.... so my bread is slightly less declicious these days)

I also usually do a little mixture of flour, brown sugar, oats and a little butter to sprinkle on top of the bread before baking. YUM!

Monday, March 27, 2017

Finishing a good book

I finished a book today, so I texted a friend who is a book lover like myself, telling her I had the "I finished a book feeling". She responded with; "The feeling of accomplishment and depression"

Isn't that exactly what ending a book feels like?!

I instantly ordered another book, and thanks to Amazon Prime will be getting it tomorrow.

I have asked a few peoples who's opinions in books I trust and have compiled a new reading list and just can't wait to start! I even think I am going to try and start a book club. I'm a little bit nervous about this as I'm not sure there are that many people out there who are as big of nerds and me and want to join a book club, but I will try non-the-less.

If you have a good suggestion, send it my way.

Now, off for a game of hide 'n seek with Kyle and Jonathan. It's one of Jonathan's favorite games.

Which reminds me, does raising a kid just make you re-live your childhood? That's how I have been feeling lately. Like the first 27 years of my life was just normal growing up, high school, college, newly-wed life, and then life starts over. Except this time, it's like a timewarp, re-living your childhood through your kids eyes. Anyone else feel this way? Or am I just tired and a little crazy?

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Work

I think I've allowed myself to view work as a bad thing lately. I was working in the yard yesterday, pulling up these pavers that the previous tenant had used to line the yard. They were deeply imbeded in the dirt and I couldn't quite figure out what they were doing with them in the first place.

Anyway, I wanted to dig them up so I could level out the soil and put down grass seed. It was labor intensive work. I did about 20 loads taking the stones from one side of the yard to the other where we will use them to make a walk-way.

Admist the work I was training our puppy and, well, training our son too. Jonathan needed a lot of training yesterday. I was starting to get a bit frustrated. It was a long hard day full of work and it was hard.

Kyle came home and I told him about my hard, kind of frustrating day.

You want to know the truth. When I stopped complaining and reflecting upon my day I really loved it. It WAS hard, really hard. But it was good. I get to shape and mold my son, we have the blessing of a little puppy to be Jonathan's playmate, and I enjoy yard work. I'm excited to see the finished product.

I think sometimes it's easier for me to enjoy something like the hard work of moving pavers around because I can see the progress, it's tangible. The work with a child isn't always tangible and lately I feel like I only see my failures, I only see where I'm inconsistent, where I should have done it or said it better, where I should have done more, gotten up earlier, played with him harder, discussed the Lord more..... and on and on. I see my daily failures and suddenly work just seemed like this hard bad thing instead of a hard good thing.

I was reminded again that it's the Lord that redeems my work, not me. And praise Him for that, because if I was doing work and trying to redeem it, WOW! we would all be in a lot of trouble in the Thompson house.

I pray daily that the Lord will redeem my work despite my failures, and that He will daily grow me in the process. I'm thankful the Lord doesn't tire of His work, and that He see's it as good. There is great comfort that He who began a GOOD WORK in me will complete it.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Can you help me?

Today Jonathan was having quite a hard time obeying. I knew it was going to be a bit hard for him to obey because he didn't get the full nights sleep he needed two nights in a row. His behavior was such that he needed consequences for his actions.

He looked at me and just started bawling. Not I got in trouble tears, or angry tears, genuine sad tears. He looked at me and said "It's so Hard!" I asked him what was so hard and he said,  "It's so hard to obey. Can you help me?"

I melted.

He has asked me for help before and we have talked about how God is our helper and we can always ask Him to help us obey and do what is right. Jonathan looked at me again and said "Can you help me pray?"

I melted.

We prayed, and he calmed down and almost fell imediately asleep in my arms. Then I began to pray. "Lord thank you! In the middle of a hard parenting day you gave me the help I needed to parent well, You gave me the words to say, You gave my little boy a soft heart to ask for help. You are our helper!"

Just when I thought Jonathan was asleep he looked up at me and said. "It's so hard to obey, can you make it easy?" We talked about how some things in life are just hard. Sometimes we have to learn to obey no matter what. BUT, if I could help him, and make it easier for him I would. I told him the easiest way to fall asleep would be to close his eyes. He did, and fell into a deep sleeps.

As he slept I rocked him and continued to pray. "Isn't that what I want Lord? I want you to make it easy for me. I want my trials to be simple, painless, and to learn without going through much. I know life is hard but I want it to be easy to obey. You have made it possible though, Lord, You have given us your Son and Your Holy Spirit. It's Hard Lord. Help me obey."

I hope that Jonathan learned something tangible about God today. I hope he remembers that when he asked for help he received it. I hope he knows that the first person to turn to is always the Lord. I know it's my job to remind him and teach him. I just pray pray pray the lessons stick.

What a weighty and beautiful thing it is to be a mom.

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

A visit

Dad came for a visit. It was short but oh so sweet.

Jonathan was just thrilled. He wanted to "snuggle" granddad every chance he got. He wanted to play with him, eat with him, sleep with him... you get the idea.

I am so thankful that even though we live far away they have such a good relationship. Dad has always been good with kids, and it's been a joy to watch him with my sisters kids. I always wondered what it would be like when I had my own and I could watch him be a grandparent to my child.

Answer: It's the best.

It's also fun when your family gets to see your home, your little town, and life. Just to be able to picture it all.

I am thankful for the time, for his love for us, and just one more memory.

Monday, March 20, 2017

Learning

Do you go through seasons of your life where the Lord has a lesson He is teaching you over and over? I'm in one of those seasons, and I'm finally at the sweet point in the lessons.

He has been teaching me to look up, focus on Him, and stay in stride. Don't look to the right or to the left, just serve the Lord, do what I (not anyone else) am called to do. Don't compare, don't judge, don't think about anything but doing what I have been called to do today. Not tomorrow, not in a month, not to worry, just do what I've been called to do today.

This lesson has had some rough moments. Some painful moments of seeing weekness in myself, of seeing worry, comparison, pride, and even lonliness.

We moved about 7 months ago to a very little town in Central California. About 5 months before our move my two older sisters and their families happened to both move to KY and live about 5 minutes away from each other. (Something I had been praying the Lord had in store for me and my family.) They had eachother and I had no family.

Comparison.

We finally are living in a house, not an apartment. I wanted to make it PERFECT. But guess what, perfect costs money, we are on a budget. I couldn't present the perfect house to everyone who walked through our door.

Pride.

I had thoughts like "look at that mom who has it all together and is perfect and her kids are perfect and her life is perfect, I'm falling apart."

Looking to the right or to the left.

Is this where we are going to live forever. That's ok, I just want to know. I don't want to move anymore. 3 moves in 5 years is enough for me. Can't we settle somewhere? What is my future?

Anxiety

We moved, I don't know anyone. We are starting over .. AGAIN... Jonathan doens't have anyone to have a play date with. I literally have no friends.

Loneliness.


Once the Lord graciously showed me my sin (side note: Isn't it incredibly kind that the Lord reveals sin to us. That he shows us exactly what we have to put to death in our lives so that we can serve him better. Not only does he reveal our sin, he doesn't do it all at once! I would die under the weight of my sin if I could see it all at once. He is kind and longsuffering.) He showed me what I do have. I have an amazing family in Jonathan and Kyle. I don't need more. He showed me that he has once again provided perfectly for us. We live in a sweet small town where we can live in a house! We have a yard! He showed me that we have a good church that teaches God's word faithfully and is full of sweet sweet brothers and sisters in the Lord. And let me tell you, they are a THANKFUL group of people.

Most importantly he reminded me ever so gently that I have HIM. I have the Lord. Let it sink in again. I have the Lord.

In trying to encourage another friend who is about to move I was reminded of Acts 17 by my sister.

"The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by human hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything. Rather, he himself gives everyone life and breath and everything else. From one man he made all the nations, that they should in habit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, thoug he is not far from any one of us. For in him we live and move and have our being. As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'

He is a knowable God. He has predetermined my home, and has done all that I might find Him.

I'm at the sweet point in the lessons. HE is the point.

We got a puppy

Yesterday we went over to the Wimer's and picked out our puppy from their litter. We had gone a couple of times to look at the puppies and get aquainted, but yesterday we got to take one home!

Jonathan named her Ginny. She is a really good puppy. She is sweet and cuddly and loves Jonathan.

I was really hesitant about the decision to get a dog. I thought about all of the logistics and time and energy a dog would take, and then realized the bottom line was that we though Jonathan needed one, which by default means that I need one.

She's been a blessing already in her first day at our house, and I can't wait to see the blessing to come.

Welcome to the family Ginny.

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Saturday Morning

Saturday Mornings are pretty much the best around here. Kyle and Jonathan wake up a little bit before me and start breakfast. It's tradition that Kyle makes Saturday morning breakfast. I really wake up when they do, but I leisurely lay in bed and listen to them talk. It's pretty hilarious. 

Then, I hear Jonathan tip-toe down the hall and "surprise" me. He jumps on the bed and says "Mom are you ready for breakfast?!" 

We're about to head to Home Depot to get a couple of supplies for the weekend projects that we have. Kyle and Jonathan are playing games and making each other laugh while they get ready. Right now they are being Rescue Bots and are putting out a fire. (I have a feeling I'll be cleaning up a lot of water in the bathroom later) 

I think these are those moments that older mom and dad's always say "soak it up, it goes by fast". I'm trying to soak it all up. 

Friday, March 17, 2017

Dump Post 2

Easter is coming which has me looking for an Easter dress. It's impossible to find because no one makes Easter dresses for women who are 6'6''. Actually, they don't even make any dresses for women who are 6'6''. Unless you are also only 100 lbs.

Summer is coming! We want to have a backyard paradise so we spend all of our time outside. I'm excited about it.

Our church meets at a school until the church building is complete. Today Jonathan and I drove by and he said "Mom! there are so many school buses at our church." Try as I might to explain, he was convinced that the building is a church and the kids just use it for a school. I realized though that I love that he already knows where our church is and that he knows that on Sunday we go to church because it's a day for Jesus. I am so so thankful for that.

It's going to be a quiet weekend just the 3 of us, doing projects (me getting well) and picking out our puppy!

I just bough this bread box/cutting board from World Market. I'm SO excited for it. If you are interested in it shoot me a message I'll tell you all about it. (There's not much to tell. I'm just excited)

I GET TO SEE MY DAD THIS WEEK!

I need a new book. I'll let you know what I choose.

Happy Friday


Thursday, March 16, 2017

Entering a new stage

Jonathan is no longer a baby at all, he's still a toddler, but almost completely a little kid. He's not napping anymore and he is talking so much and loves new things. I've decided the first 3 years of life are watching your kid rapidly change from stage to new stage.

We're entering a new one. It's fun so far. I clearly don't know exactly how to describe it, but I think it might be the best one yet. (yes, I say that every time)

He's currently drawing chalk trains and families (big smiley faces with little legs) on the patio, and he's talking to himself, making up stories to go along with each drawing. He just screamed "It's alive!"

He's so imaginative. I wish I knew what was happening in his head. I think he's going to be quite the artist as he gets older. I hope to hang one of his paintings in my house some day.

Anyway, I just don't want to foget that today you are changing Jonathan, and I'm loving watching every moment. I love being your mom.

Summer is coming

I got back from my weekend away and instantly got sick. I've been out all week. It's been horrible. I'm starting to see a gimmer though. I'm about to join the land of the living again!

I actually ventured out of doors. I sat on the patio as Jonathan drew chalk trains. It was glorious. A couple of days ago I didn't have the energy to think anything more than "I'm sick" and today I have started thinking about summer and getting the house/yard ready for swim days and backyard BBQ's. My goal is to spend about 60% of every day outside in the summer. I hope it happens.

Also, we are choosing our puppy this weekend. I'm actually getting a little excited. I bought a dog training book and everything. I think it's gonna be good for all of us. Mostly, Jonathan, but then again it will end up being good for me. Just one more thing to keep me busy and not lazy and outside. I mean I'll have to take it on a walk every day. OH! daily family walks. That's probably going to be a thing in our near future.

Oh the glorious world of being well. So much to do.

Monday, March 13, 2017

Away

Kyle sent me away this past weekend. I started missing my guys pretty much as soon as I pulled out of the driveway, but it was so nice to see friends, and catch up. I hadn't realized just how much I missed some of my friends until I was talking to them.

I hadn't even spent one night away from Jonathan since he was 9 months old. It felt so strange to not tuck him in at night. But I really did come home refeshed and so much more energized to tackle the daily activities before me.

Through some sweet conversations the Lord just reminded me again that I am to "stay in stride". Just serve Him and let him take care of all the rest. Don't look to the right or to the left, just keep my focus on Him.

I heard a wonderful sermon by Austin Duncan in Crossroads on Hebrews 12 and running the race with endurance. If you are interested in listening, check here in the next couple of days. They'll upload it soon.

Thanks babe, for making sure I get refeshed.

Wednesday, March 8, 2017

shops

There are a few things I'm loving around the internet these days. I am not on facebook or snapchat or twitter... just instagram, email and this blog. So here are some shops that you all probably know all about alread (ok, some I am SURE you know about  because other wise you would be living under a rock, and then we'd have bigger issues than if you knew about these online stores or not.) and some may be new to you... here you go

First is Magnolia Market's web site. I know we all wish  Chip and Jojo would just show up at our house and ask to fix it up for free, but we live in the real world and even if we think we know Chip and Jo, they don't have a clue who we are. Also, some of us can't just head on over to the Silo's because it's not in the budget to buy a plane ticket for a shopping spree. So.... there is Magnolia Market online. And more affordable than expected.

Next, The Mercantile If you aren't obsessed with The Pioneer Woman then I'm just not sure we can be friends anymore. Just kidding... but really. Okay, Confession (see what I did there?) I don't like every single thing in the shop. But I like a ton of it, and I LOVE all her food. And, even the things I wouldn't buy are things I enjoy looking at because they are fun and funny.

The House of Belonging She started with cute signs that I found through etsy. But her site keeps growing and she keeps adding super cute stuff... I'm personally going to buy the t-shirt that says "you& boots & flannel& latte's& bonfires" That pretty much sums up my life. 

Thank you Gear Patrol, for giving us the 10 best coffee subscriptions out there. When you live in the sticks like me (ok, ok, not the sticks. But let me tell you good coffee is hard to come by) you want to know where you can get the liquid gold and fast. gear patrol, 10 best coffee subscriptions

4 is my favorite number, so I think I'll stop at 4 shops. I'll try to add some more goodness soon. 

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Standing Still

Kyle and I have been trying for baby number 2 for quite some time. We were blessed with a baby, but then lost it a couple of months ago.

I'm going to be honest, when I usually see people post incredibly person things on social media I feel a bit awkward. Probably because it's not something that I would do, which isn't really any standard at all. I have gone back and forth about wether or not I wanted to write something about our miscarriage and I have decided I want to because the friends that I have that were willing to be vulnerable and share a bit about what they learned or went through really encouraged my heart. Then, after going through a miscarriage their words meant even more.

I have no idea who might see this, or when, but I hope that you see a glimpse of my heart and are encouraged. I also want to look back through this cataloge of our life and remember ALL of it. The good and the hard.

I've had a general feeling of sadness since we lost the baby. It's just sort of with me. I haven't felt completely myself since we lost it. I know healing will come, and some has come already. But I've learned it's ok to be sad and mourn this loss. I haven't stopped living and am enjoying the life that is around me. I'm living and sad at the same time. The Lord is sustaining me and giving joy in the trial.

The Lord has comforted us in ways that I don't really know how to put into words. That sounds kind of lame to say and feels completely insufficient to say, but it's true. He comforts with Himself. With the truth of His character and the fulfillment of His promises. To experience those things is great comfort indeed. The church really came around us and loved on us. I learned a lot about myself and through the trial I fell more in love with Kyle. He was my greatest earthly comfort and so steady for me.

It's that season of life for me where just about every one around me is having children. I have recieved 4 emails this week to sign up and bring a meal to a new mother in the church, I have family that is pregnant, I have friends who are pregnant and as I see life grow and flourish around me, I feel just a bit like I'm standing still.

I wonder what my child would have been like, I wonder if he/she would have been creative or athletic or both. Would he/she have loved to read and go on walks with me and have a sense of adventure, or been more of a home body? What color of eyes? What color hair?

Isn't it amazing how much we can love someone we haven't met? I love my child. I cannot wait to meet him/her. I can't wait to hold him/her and tell my child I love it with my whole heart.

I am so thankful for  Lord who loves my children even more than I do. Who has ushered my little one to heaven and holds it in His loving arms.

My child is safe and loved. I find great peace in that.

But I'm still sad.

Monday, March 6, 2017

Stages

Growing up seems to simply be a series of "stages". In Jonathan's first year and a half of life I felt like he was in a new stage every 3 months. Slowly the stages have lengthened. It's strange how at 3 I can feel like certain stages last FOREVER, and then when I recall them it seems as if they went by in a flash. 

I find myself wanting to speed certain stages up, like potty training (can I get an amen?! I'm sure he'll be potty trained by 5.... or 6 at the latest) and I want to freeze time during other cuter stages. Like how he used to call his Aunt Abigail "Agibail" until recently. 

Here are a list of things I don't wan't to forget. 

He is terrified of most bugs. But also obsessed. Then he gets over his fear and is just obsessed, until he find the next bug he is scared of. So far we have gone through ladybugs, worms and snails. Seems he is a bit nervous about spiders right now. I am NOT looking forward to him being obsessed with those.

He says something and then instantly contradicts himself. "It is not a joke, but it is." "I will not get out of bed tonight. Except I will." "That was not funny, but it was funny." "I will obey, but I won't" "I don't love you, but I do." 

He is sweet and gentle with all children and especially babies. If a baby around him is crying he will stop whatever he is doing and come make sure the baby is ok.

He has a crazy memory! I am ALWAYS shocked by it. At some point I'll just accept that he has an excellent memory and move on. Right now I am surprised everytime he remembers something I would have expected him to forget.

He is social and loves to be with family and friends.

He loves the outdoors. Can't get enough of them.

His imagination is really coming out. I love to spy on him when he's playing and hear the stories he comes up with. 

He dances a lot and is also doing a lot of kung-fu. (I must remember to get this on video)

He hates eating things with multiple textures. I don't really want to get more into that because it has been the source of much conflict in our home. 

He is telling stories. They are hilarious. They don't make sense at all, but he's super into them and they usually end at an awkward moment. 

Baking

I love to bake. I enjoy cooking too but don't feel quite as good at it. Baking on the other hand is comforting and fun and easy to share.

It is something I did with my mom and grandmother and great-grandmother. It's something that makes me feel tied to my family. It's something I want to pass on. I just love it.

I'm going to start sharing some recipes on here. There won't be any particular rhyme or reason to it, but I hope you enjoy them all the same.

This afternoon I made some Honey Whole Wheat Bread. I use the Gold Medal Flour recipe. It's great. I have tweeked with it here and there and ultimately I come down to the fact that theirs is pretty darn good, and easy. I have another recipe that I'll post sometime. It's my mom's. A little more complicated, but makes 3 loaves instead of 2, and has a slightly different flavor.



Here is a link to the recipe. Honey Whole Wheat Bread

Hint: If you are having a hard time with your yeast rising then try adding a pinch of sugar to it.
          Rub some butter over the top right when you pull it out of the oven. It gives the crust a yummy flavor.

Friday, March 3, 2017

Dump Post

I think Fridays are a great time to do a "dump post" my random thoughts of the day or week, and hopefully something to make you laugh. Like this...

1.Yesterday I told Jonathan he had to make a choice. He could obey mama and get a blessing, or he could disobey and get a consequence.

Without looking up from playing with his blocks he said "Well that doesn't seem very nice."

2. There has been nice weather this week! I don't know how to tell you how amazing this is after SO. MUCH. FOG. and rain. I don't really mind the rain, but it's been a lot. We've been playing outside a lot and its great.

3. Jonathan is transitioning to not napping anymore.................................................................................

4. I think we are getting a puppy. I say I "think" because basically the decision is up to me. Kyle and Boone are on board and really want one. I want a perfectly trained puppy that can't chew up anything and will come perfectly when I call it. I have not been super successful with potty training my son, how am I going to potty train a puppy? But I just come back to the fact that I think it would be really good for Boone and it would make Kyle happy.

I'm soft.

I think we are getting a puppy.




Thursday, March 2, 2017

"Parenting"

In our almost 6 years of marriage Kyle and I have moved 5 times. 3 of those moves were to a different city. When we made this most recent move I didn't think too much about it in terms of parenting. He was only 2 1/2, I didn't think he would notice the move all that much and would enjoy living in a larger place. A yard, a playroom, a house instead of an apartment. I figured he'd be in heaven.

I was wrong.

The move was probably the hardest on him and there was a lot of adjusting that has needed to take place these last six months. In hindsight I have to admit that I think it was partially so hard on him because of me. I expected my 2 1/2 year old to be able to process and adjust, well, like me. (smacks forehead and shakes head) I was focused on unpacking and getting the house in order, so that Kyle could just focus on his new territory and role at work. I was trying to meet people at church, have families over so we could be plugged in and feel at home. Those things are all well and good, but I let parenting go on the back burner.

I brought Jonathan along on everything I did. But my normally sweet natured boy was having huge fits, disobeying like never before and slowly I was losing my patience.

In tears of frustration I called Kyle and asked him to pray for me one day. He did. He also ordered me Paul Tripps new book on parenting. "Parenting 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family."

I needed it like I can't even begin to describe. A lot of it is stuff I have heard or been taught before, and yet the reminder was both timely and needed. Some of it is stuff I hadn't thought through, and NEEDED to think through.

Jonathan can still be naughty (he's a toddler after all... and a sinner) But I have noticed my focus, my purpose, my approach to parenting has come back to the gospel where it needed to be from day one. I remembered how consistent I need to be. I've had to rearrange life a bit so I can make sure consistency in parenting is my priority. I've seen a huge change these last 2 weeks and am so thankful that I have a husband who put truth in my hands when I needed it.

If you haven't read it yet, even if you are the best parent in the world, read Parenting by Paul Tripp. It's worth it.

Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Questions

Boone has been asking questions lately. He is a toddler and I figured the "why" questions were on their way, but he's been asking questions I wasn't quite prepared for. This morning he asked me "How did God make me."

We had a chat about how God made everything by the power of his word. Then we talked about why God made us and how we are to worship him with our lives.

These moments of parenting are both encouraging and frightening to me. The weightiness of my calling is so clear to me when he asks these kind of questions. I realize how needy I am of the Lord's wisdom. I'm also encouraged that I am here to be able to answer, that I can sit and talk with him and I'm encouraged he's even asking!

He's also noticing everything around him. He's pointing out all that he sees. I am constantly trying to keep his mind occupied and I love how much he loves to learn. I pray he stays that way.

Hello

I am writing this blog because I want to cataloge all of the memories, lessons, blessings, trials and joys of being a wife, mom, and ransomed sinner. I expect only my close friends and family will follow along, but anyone is welcome. You'll probably see everything from what funny thing Boone said, to what I am making for dinner. (Tonight we are going to have BBQ chicken with rice and veggies.)

If you are following along and don't know me then here is what you should know. I am a christian. My faith is the most important thing about me. I am a sinner saved by the work of Jesus on the Cross. I am a wife to the best, most patient, gracious man. He would want you to know that he's funny. I think the verdict is still out on that one. (just kidding honey, you're hilarious.) I am a mother to Jonathan Boone. I have a feeling most of this blog will be devoted to him. He is sweet, stubborn, smart, and in every way a toddler. I like to cook, love making a house into a home, and I really love working on projects with my husband. Oh, and I am very tall. If you don't actually know me you should know that, because if you did know me it would be the first thing you noticed.