Hospitality

We all love a good dinner party, going to a friends house and watching the kids play in the backyard, we love good food, good conversation and simply being together. It's as if we were created to be together, and even more deeply, created for hospitality. We were! John Piper taught a sermon in 1985 on Strategic Hospitality and I want to share a bit of it below. It's a little background to our motivation for hospitality. At the end I'm gonna share some practical tips in practicing hospitality.

The Meaning of Grace 

"Grace is the hospitality of God to welcome sinners not because of their goodness but because of his glory. If God chose not to magnify the glory of his own self-sufficiency, and instead to enrich himself by looking for talented and virtuous housemates, there would be no grace in the world, and no hospitality, and no salvation. We owe our eternal life to grace, and grace is God's disposition to glorify his freedom and power and wealth by showing hospitality to sinners."

The Ultimate Act of Hospitality Done for God's Glory

The ultimate act of hospitality was when Jesus Christ died for sinners to make everyone who believes a member of the household of God. We are no longer strangers and sojourners. We have come home to God. Everybody who trusts in Jesus finds a home in God.

And why did God do it? Why send his only Son to die so that sinners could have hospitality in heaven? Ephesians 1:5–6: "He destined us in love to be his sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace."

He did it for the praise of the glory of his grace. It was the same reason that he rescued unworthy strangers in Egypt—for his own glory. This was grace in the Old Testament and it is grace in the New.

"By grace are you saved through faith; and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God" (Ephesians 2:8). The ultimate foundation of Christian hospitality is God's unwavering commitment to glorify the freedom and all-sufficiency of his grace.

Our Motivation to Practice Hospitality 

So then what is our motivation for practicing hospitality? It comes from a memory of the past and a hope for the future.

Looking Back 

We look back and remember that we owe our life to an act of God's hospitality. We were once strangers and aliens in the Egypt of sin and death. But God came to us in the Passover of his Son's cross (1 Corinthians 5:7) and made us alive (Ephesians 2:5) and brought us out through the Red Sea of conversion.

Looking Forward 

Then we turn and look forward into a future where we are loved with an omnipotent power and zeal that are as sure as the commitment God has to his own glory. He will meet all our needs in the wilderness of this life, and he will see us safely through the Jordan into the promised homeland, where we will enjoy the milk and honey of his fellowship forever."

This is all from a sermon John Piper did on Hospitality. It's so good and I have just shared bits of it. I highly suggest listening to the Hospitality Sermon .

So now that we know WHY we should practice hospitality, lets get into the practicality of making it happen and how to make it fun and not stressful. We will post a lot about hospitality over time, but here are our starting principles.

1. Be Prepared

2. Be Intentional

3. Be Others Minded

4. Have Clear Communication / Expectations 

5. Remember Why You're Doing This

1. Be Prepared. 

It's a bit hard to invite the mom from the park, or the kids in your sons class at school, or friends from church, or a family in need over if you aren't prepared.

We all live on budgets, and don't they just seem to be getting tighter and tighter? The idea of increasing the grocery budget so that you can be intentionally hospitable is enough to make most of us throw in the towel before we even get started. Check out our meal planning guide. I really think this is a huge help. Also, there is nothing wrong with a little "Potluck Style" hosting. Want to have a bunch of people over? Ask everyone to make a dish. If there is a particular family that you know is in need or doesn't have as flexible of a budget, ask them to bring a budget friendly item. They are going to want to participate, but may not accept your invitation if it's a strain on the budget. They could bring a bag of Ice, Potato Chips, Whipped Cream, or Paper Goods. Use your imagination.

Know where to get the best deal on groceries. I try to take one day every few months and compare prices at local stores. 

Make ahead. Want to bake with your kids? Double the cookie dough recipe, freeze all of your extra cookies, pull them out when people come by. They defrost quickly, and who doesn't love a cookie. 

Is your house kid friendly? Is it baby proof? Have a bin with toys in it that you can pull out easily when kids come over. I loved going over to peoples house who had a toy drawer. My kids played happily and I was able to have some adult conversation. It was a big deal. It doesn't have to be a huge drawer, kids entertain themselves easily. Toy's don't have to be expensive either. Every garage sale I have ever been to in my entire life has toys. Often the toys are in a free bin, aren't us moms ALWAYS purging? A few craft supplies never hurt either. 

I think you are getting the idea.

2. Be Intentional

Who do you invite over? When do you invite over? 

It might not be your "personality" to have people into your home. This may be new to you and a bit scary. Start simple. Ask yourself who is in need of hospitality (yes, I believe the answer is everyone, but think of the greatest needs) Is there a widow in your church? Is there a single parent at your kids school? Is your child friends with someone who has a hard home life? 

If you don't have anyone like that in your life then maybe start with a play date or a BBQ. These are low key situations with lots of flexibility.

When do you do all of this inviting? You have kids to care for, a home to clean, errands to run and schedules to coordinate with your spouse. Look at your calendar and choose a day of the week that is always open to having people over. We do Thursdays. But I must warn you. Once you have people over and they know they are welcome you may just have people start to stop by whenever. Yay! This is the goal. This is real fellowship and life together. This is hospitality and what an amazing way to raise your kids. 

3. This point is hard, and simple. It's not about you. It's about honoring Christ, being a light, and serving others. Simple. Hard.

4. Talk clearly to your spouse about what hospitality should look like in your home. Go over your budget, be prayerful the Lord will bless your efforts (we can't do anything in our own strength) Talk about when you should have family time and when to fling the doors open wide. Communicate, over communicate. Be on the same page.

5. It's not easy to put your desires and schedule on the back burner to serve others. It's not easy to have people in your house and see the dust and laundry pile. It's not easy to have people be witness to your parenting mistakes and failures. But it's worth it. Why? Because it's what Christ did for us. He didn't wait for us to be perfect, he picked us out of our sinful mess and made us new in him. Our motivation is Christ-likeness and to be a light to a dark world. Remember your motive. This helps when the doorbell rings at an inopportune time.